By Books Author Denise Turney

What do you think about this? On average, you have anywhere from 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts a day.¹ That’s a lot of thinking! If you’ve recalled your dreams, you’ve experienced your mind thinking while you’re sleeping, which brings up an important fact.

What Never Stops Thinking

Your mind never stops! Even more, what you think creates situations. Continual thoughts influence how you feel and what you think about yourself and your environment. Your thoughts are powerful!

During a day, you might think about a project you’re working on, a community event you’re interested in attending, how your body looks or feels, a relationship, your finances and what you’re going to do over the weekend. Furthermore and although you might not consider it, there’s something you think about a lot and it’s having a huge impact.

Can you guess what it is?

It’s YOU!

How Long Have You Been Wrongly Judged?

Many of the thoughts you have regard YOU at some level, in some way. This means that what you think about yourself is absolutely critical. It impacts everything you feel, do, talk yourself in or out of, believe and more.

If you’ve spent years striving to achieve a goal only to consistently face a seemingly impenetrable wall, your perceptions about YOU could be what’s actually creating the wall. How you see yourself can empower you or rob you of goodness.

Here’s a test. Take a few minutes to reflect on situations and people who you feel happy, safe and loved around. Could be a loving parent, a trustworthy friend, a pet, a certain holiday or a favorite vacation spot.

Is The Thought Door Opening or Closing You to Good?

Are there certain words or phrases that spring to mind when you reflect on these people and situations? For instance, do these descriptors pop up:

• She’s such a good friend
• I can always rely on him
• That’s got to be one of the most beautiful places on earth
• It’s so much fun attending those events
• As long as I’ve had my pet dog, she’s been loyal and so loving

Regardless of how busy your schedule or how fatigued you are, there probably isn’t much resistance when it comes to thinking about being in those situations or with those people or pets. The door is always open.

Do the opposite. Reflect on people and situations that you experience fear-based emotions (i.e. anger, disappointment, anxiety, frustration) when you are around them. Again, this could be a neighboring bully, supervisor who enjoys criticizing you, violent ex-partner, a house that keeps breaking down or a computer that regularly stalls, causing you to lose valuable data.

Linking Thoughts and Emotions

Which descriptors automatically surface in your mind when you’re around these people or are in these situations? Are any of these familiar:

• Never should have bought this house. It’s nothing but trouble.
• This is the last time I’m eating at this restaurant. The service and the food are bad.
• She can’t stand me. Being mean to me brings her joy.
• He’s so unpredictable; he scares me.
• If I had the money, I’d swap this computer out for another one.

Focusing on the above phrases and descriptors, how do you feel? Do you feel like you can trust these people and situations? Furthermore, does life feel good and open to you when you simply think about these people and these situations?

Uncovering Hidden Sabotaging Thoughts

Believe it or not, you’ve probably felt and thought a range of both about yourself. Hiding judgments and perceptions about yourself doesn’t clear out the perceptions and judgments. It just pushes them down, out of conscious mind, and far enough away so you get lost as it regards knowing why you feel the way you do and why you stop yourself from living fully.

To live more fully, pay attention to what you think about YOU.

Simply notice what you think about yourself. Easy ways to do this are to:

• Write in a journal (do this daily or 3 to 5 times a week)
• Type the first thought that pops into your mind in to a spreadsheet when you waken (you’ll start to notice repetitive thoughts and might start to see how those thoughts link to your emotions)
• Sit still in the morning and before you go to bed and just watch thoughts pass like clouds across your mind

Promise Yourself

Beyond noticing what you think about yourself, commit to love yourself. Back to a good friend and situations that cause you to feel joy, peace and safe — start talking to and about yourself in ways that empower you, that help you open to more good. Be a good friend to YOU!

Why is this important?

What you think about yourself builds your self-identity. A strong, love-based self-identity offers the courage to go after what you really want. Additionally, a strong, love-based self-identity lets you know you can overcome challenges, get through trying situations while walking in peace and shift into higher levels of living.

Forbes shares that, “Having a solid sense of self is essential to your overall well-being, mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual health – fueling your recognition of your worth.”² The periodical goes on to say, “Lacking a strong sense of self can make it hard to know what you want – forging feelings of uncertainty or indecisiveness for important decisions.”

Thoughts and Your Self-Identity

Self-identity keeps you stuck or it can set you free. For example, if you see yourself as an impatient truck driver who should be thankful to simply have a job that pays the bills, you might never become a patient, caring chiropractor, even if that’s what you truly want to do.

The way you see yourself (what you think about YOU) determines what you achieve. Whether you live the life you came here to live or not is truly up to you.

It’s been said that nothing changes in your world until you change (on the inside). In fact, there’s a school of thought that the “outer world” is merely a reflection of your inner world. Neville Goddard, Alan Watts, Lisa Nichols, Tony Robbins, Dr. Wayne Dyer and others have shared these truths for years.

Healing Starts with YOU!

Knowing this, the greatest thing you can pull off is to love yourself. See and feel yourself living the life you want. Actually, see yourself doing and being in situations you want to be in now – not seeing yourself more patient, more loving, more courageous, more insightful, etc. in the future, but seeing yourself that way right now.

Sure. It might take a few days, but you should start to feel and see shifts happening on the inside and outside. Keep at it. Seek support through open discussions with trustworthy people who love you, therapy, books, etc.

Loving yourself is very powerful. It’s also the only way to heal.

Resources:

1. https://tlexmindmatters.com/#:~:text=It%20was%20found%20that%20the,thoughts%20as%20the%20day%20before.
2. https://www.forbes.com/sites/womensmedia/2022/06/16/heres-how-your-personal-identity-and-sense-of-self-affect-your-growth/?sh=14198feb69bf