Sports Greats Who Walk Away from the Game too Soon

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track and field sports greats competing in close race
Track and field sports greats crossing finish line

By Books Author Denise Turney

Sports greats invest years of razor-sharp focus, commitment and practice into their chosen field. Their performances do more than grab our attention. They make life’s challenges feel less arduous. Don’t think so? Ever catch your gaze glued to the television screen, caught up in the back and forth of a sports competition?

Acrobatic end zone catches, the pass you thought your favorite wide receiver could never make but did. The perfect somersault landing that your top gymnast scored. A track and field competitor’s stride opening like a gazelle’s, allowing the middle-distance runner to win another Olympic gold medal.

It’s hard to ignore incredible sports feats. No wonder you find it impossible to turn away from the television. You don’t want this suspended amazement to end. Live vicariously through sports greats and you could go on winning indirectly forever watching professional sports, college competitions and open races at events like the Penn Relays.  

Sports great addiction

While you are glued to a sports competition, you probably forget about a struggle at work, an argument that you had with your beau or a bill that just came in the mail you know you don’t have the money to pay. That alone can make tuning into spots addictive.

After all, who doesn’t want to forget their problems? Yet, sports greats, the best of the gladiators, are human. If they entered their field with a one-track mind, by the time they invest 10 years into their sport, it’s highly unlikely that they still have a one-track mind.

Barry Sanders, Justine Henin, Jim Brown and Lorena Ochoa are sports greats who proved they didn’t have a one-track mind. Jim Brown went into acting and took up social struggles. Barry stepped into a well-balanced life. At least that what it looks like from the outside. Yet, it might be the fact that sports heroes actually think about something other than sport that alarms spectators most.

Why sports greats let you down

You also might want sports greats to entertain you more, longer. It’s as if you think they let you down when they chose to pursue a different goal. It’s this bitter taste that Raymond Clarke can leave in you, especially if you’re an avid sports fan.

You watch sports greats like Raymond Clarke, a major player in Love Pour Over Me, work hard to reach the top of their game. They push past some of life’s hardest challenges. You watch these sports greats keep going no matter what. Admit it. You root for them. Forget personality flaws. You want your favorite athletes to win.

And then, just when you thought they were on track to win for another five years, they up and retire. They quit the sport that they’ve loved since they were a kid, the very sport that you still love, but only from the sidelines.

Why it’s so hard to let sports greats retire

It’s hard to digest that you might spend the rest of your days trying to figure out why a sports great walked away from the game too soon. Think about it. It happened with Barry Sanders and Jim Brown, to name two sports greats.

Sports commentators and fans still try to figure out why Barry and Jim walked away from football when they did. It’s almost as if we want the right to tell sports greats when they can retire. That time would never be before you’re emotionally and psychologically ready.

Get your copy of Love Pour Over Me

Courageous Patience for New Beginnings

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beautiful heart patience pendant

By Novel Writer Denise Turney

New beginnings are welcomed, celebrated. At the same time, they are feared, avoided. Have you ever dealt with a loss that you knew, deep down, you just knew, took the old you with it? It may have been the loss of a child, the loss of a parent, sibling or even the loss of a job that you’d worked for more than 30 years.

Please Leave Things the Way They Were

For you, there is no going back. If you’re particularly reluctant to release your former life, the only life you may have known, you might return to a former residence, seriously consider moving back home or seek out another job that reminds you so much of the job you just left.

The person who tries to toss out or move your deceased child’s clothes might be greeted with a powerful show of anger and distaste from you. “Leave it the way it is” might be your cry. It’s understandable.

Reinventing a brand-new life and evolving into new beginnings is no easy task. This reinvention demands that you examine your deepest beliefs. Yes. Get forced to let go of everything that you knew, and you will ask profound questions. It makes perfectly good sense. After all, the ground beneath your feet has shifted.

When Trusting New Beginnings Is Hard

Trust may be a hard to surface as you progress through your former life and move toward new beginnings. Love Pour Over Me‘s Raymond Clarke knows all too well about these awkward, painful adjustments.

It takes him a long time, decades, to learn to release his past life. Because of this, it takes him a long time to receive the love that awaits him, love he won’t receive until after one of the most important people in his life departs this world.

Are you at a crossroads? Or are you trying to cope with a painful loss? Perhaps Raymond’s story will speak to you. His story is the fictional account of volumes of real-life stories that fill newspaper, magazine and journal archives. Through his life you might find an answer that you are seeking.

New Beginnings – When You Experience Real Pain

You might find a path or technique that helps you to move forward, to enter a rewarding new beginning. As Raymond learns in Love Pour Over Me, be patient with yourself. It really does take courageous patience to advance into new beginnings.

Depending on the depth of the shift, you might start out feeling numb, detached from the loss. Crying might be something you rarely, if ever, do. This is a time when people around you (family, colleagues, neighbors, friends) might think you’re strong.

Because it reduces their need to alter their lives in order to deal with the great change you’re in the middle of, they may like you better this way versus seeing you sob. For this reason, meditating and spending time alone resting could be paramount as you move forward, never to be the same again.

Courageous Patience for the New Road Ahead

People you know might tell you that you really know how to trust God if you display little to no emotion around the loss. But they are only seeing your mask. And they might be grateful for that. Your mask rewards them with the illusion that things really haven’t changed that much and that after a certain amount of time, things will go back to the way they were before the loss occurred.

But that’s not going to happen. Ever.

Which is why it takes courageous patience to advance into new beginnings. Bless yourself with the patience to fall, get back up, fall again and wobble or crawl back up. Gift yourself with the patience to let your emotions rock, stand in the fear of the unknown and accept that you don’t now (nor ever did) know all there is to know about anything.

Favor yourself with patience as you struggle to release the past. Give yourself time to create a brand-new life. After all, this is a new life that you (not someone else) are going to live. Don’t rush it. Be exceptionally kind and gentle with yourself even if others are not.

Look For Cues

Look within for cues that you’re on the right path. Permit yourself to experience joy and happiness, even as you work your way through grief. Your courageous patience is a sign of self-love.

This same courageous patience might serve as a light to other people years from now. Your courageous patience to begin again might help to lead others out of a past that no longer works just as Raymond Clarke’s journey has done in the book Love Pour Over Me.

What Happens When Light and Darkness Dance

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By Denise Turney


love flowers

Wikimedia Commons – GNU Free Documentation License

The best experiences in this world still seem to showcase the illusion that there’s a dance between light and darkness. Sweet dreams are challenged by family departures, political upheaval, economic crisis and relationship disappointments. By the time you do fulfill a dream or reach the top of a long term goal, you might feel fatigued.

Getting to the top is only part of the path

Then, there’s the work of maintaining the levels of success that you worked hard to gain. If you earn an income as an athlete and you’ve been competing for longer than 15 years, you know how hard it is to accept that, despite how hard you work out or despite how many mental exercises, including meditation, that you engage in, you’re aging body is changing in ways that will soon force you away from the sport you love so much.

It happens to parents who invest years into their children only to stand at the edge of the front yard and watch those same children, now grown adults, drive away from the house that they grew up in for the last time. Intervals between change, times when you feel or sense that something is about to happen that you have no control over, can be tough.

Letting go is part of this world’s dance

You’ve got it. Life in this world is a series of “embraces” and “let gos“. It’s the “let gos” that can make it feel like darkness is dancing with light. You win to let go of the life experiences that made you feel like you were on top.

If you’re like Raymond Clarke, the main character in the novel Love Pour Over Me, you might seek the safest life possible as an attempt to avoid having to let go of someone or something you love. For Raymond, the dance started early, when Raymond was only two years old.

Continuing to move forward – advance; keep loving

That’s when Raymond’s mother abandoned him, leaving him to fend for himself while he grew up with his father, Malcolm. After Raymond’s mother abandon’s him, Malcolm sinks deep into untreated alcoholism. It’s at this point that Raymond becomes much more than a son. It’s at this point that Raymond becomes a target for his father’s disappointments, rage, fear and hurt.

It’s a miracle that Raymond survives, but survive Raymond does. Yet, a hard childhood has left Raymond with emotional and psychological wounds. Raymond carries these wounds with him to university in Pennsylvania. As much as Raymond seeks to conceal his wounds, they seep into his relationships, especially his closest relationships.

And the dance begins.

Get your copy of “Love Pour Over Me” Now at –

http://www.ebookit.com/books/0000001582/Love-Pour-Over-Me.html

Sources:

Amazon.com – http://www.amazon.com/Love-Pour-Over-Me-ebook/dp/B007MC0Z2C

Barnes & Noble – http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/love-pour-over-me-denise-turney/1109600654

Book Readers Need These 3 Things

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By Denise Turney


Love pour over me website

Book readers need three things when dealing with book writers. Relationships are at the core of each of these three things. As a book writer, if you fail to give book readers these three things, you could fail to gain book sales, disappoint book readers or even lose existing book sales. James Baldwin, J. K. Rowling, John Irvin, Toni Morrison, Jane Austen, August Wilson and Lorraine Hansberry are a few authors who understand the importance of two of these three musts.

Book readers want challenging relationships

To grow your career as a new author, you need to get these three things down early. As a new book author, you need to develop characters that make it easy for book readers to feel like they are in real relationships with their fictional characters. You might not love the storyline. But, if you read Lord of the Rings, you probably couldn’t forget Frodo Baggins, Gandalf or Gollum.

Not a Lord of the Rings fan? Think about your favorite novels. Next, think about one or more characters in those novels that you feel deeply connected to, that you care about. How easy was it to put that novel down, turning away from a character who left a deep impression on you?

Focus on character development

Focus on character development; it’s at the heart of what talented authors do. It’s also why talented novelists keep their characters in periods of uncertainty, cliff hangers, conflict and challenge. Even flawed novel characters have at least one trait that you, the book reader, judge as positive or valuable.

Who can forget Dr. Hyde, Mrs. Henry Lafayette Duobse in To Kill a Mockingbird or the money grubbing businessman in Spiral? Bad characters fuel Tyler Perry’s latest television series, shows like The Haves and Have Nots. Without characters who are struggling with darkness books like Harry Potter, Star Wars and Lord of the Rings might not have intrigued millions of readers.

These inner struggles may remind of us hidden parts of ourselves, parts we long to deny. What is certain is that flawed characters demand our attention. After you start to care about a character, it’s hard to not care what happens to that character. Discovering what happens to a character requires that you keep reading, keep turning pages in a book. Even more, building a book readership demands that you give readers the types of relationships with novel characters that readers not only care about, but relationships that readers will feel, almost as if the fictional encounters are real.

Major characters relating to minor characters

In addition to feeling connected to one or more characters in a novel, book readers want to find value in observing, watching or witnessing exchanges that occur between a main character and minor characters in a novel. It’s a fact. There’s an element of voyeurism in fictional story digesting.

Book readers want to watch their favorite novel characters interact with other characters. After all, it’s those relationships that drive the story. Rarely is it the case that a story’s setting works like a character. Fictional stories where this happened include Castaway, On Golden Pond and Wind River.

J. California Cooper, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Ernest Hemingway, Joyce Carol Oates, Alice Walker and Gloria Naylor are among the novelists who are highly skilled at character interaction. These skilled authors make developing great character interactions look easy.

Third thing book readers love

The third element that book readers need to love a story and a novelist’s work might surprise you. Book readers want to enjoy a rewarding relationship with a novel’s author. An author’s relationship with book readers could come through book signings, book readings, cultural festivals that authors serve as panelists or keynote speakers at.

Direct email, holiday greetings, free new book excerpts and question and answer sessions at the end of speaking engagements or radio interviews are other avenues through which an author’s relationship with book readers could develop. These aren’t personal relationships.

Instead, they are artistic relationships that focus on art that writers create. Rewards of these boo reader relationships include the chance for authors to let book readers know what drives a character or why the author had a character perform a specific act.

If book readers and authors do connect during events like book club meetings, book conferences and book signings, readers could gain a fourth relationship. Readers could meet and start friendships with other book lovers.

Thank you for reading my blog. To learn what happens to Raymond, Brenda and the other characters in Love Pour Over Me, hop over to Amazon.com, B&N.com, Ebookit.com, or any other online or offline bookseller and get your copy of Love Pour Over Me today. And again I say – Thank You! Consider Love.

7 Great Reasons to Read The Love Pour Over Me Book

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By Denise Turney



Love Pour Over Me BookLove Pour Over Me is a book that takes a realistic look at a complicated parent/child relationship. When I first started writing Love Pour Over Me, it was emotionally easy. As I fleshed Malcolm and Raymond out more, it got harder to keep writing at the same fast pace that I had started writing the novel with.

Why? Memories from my own childhood were starting to arise, muddying the process involved in getting the first full draft of the story on paper.

Love Pour Over Me was not an easy book to write

As with each book that I have written, including Portia, Spiral, Long Walk Up, Rosetta’s Great Adventure and Love Has Many Faces, bits and pieces of my own history were finding their way into the pages of Love Pour Over Me. Believe it or not, this fact is what makes writing books a boundless blessing.

Once a story dredges up deep emotion in me as an author, I have no choice except to revisit my own unique, personal “real life” past and deal with the emotional root. Authors who do this work can finally go free of personal thought and behavior patterns that may have plagued them for years.

Another blessing that strong emotions offer me as an author is directly related to the novel. Strong emotions that I feel easily transfer to the page. It’s this emotion that connects readers to characters.

For me, this is when I absolutely love creating novels.

Adult problems with trying to understand a mysterious childhood

Although I didn’t grow up with an alcoholic parent like Raymond (Love Pour Over Me’s main character), as with many people, I saw my fair share of struggles as a kid. I tried to understand unclear and hard-to-explain events that were happening around me; like you did when you were a kid, I tried to explain the hard-to-explain through the eyes of a very young child.

It’s these attempts to explain the mysterious that can cause childhood and adult confusion. Add the drive to be right and it’s easy to see why people like Raymond Clarke get stuck. The thing is that Raymond is not alone. He’s not the only person who develops defense systems to avoid future hurts. He’s not the only one who keeps expecting childhood survival strategies to work effectively after he becomes an adult.

Here are the seven great reasons to read the Love Pour Over Me book

If you’ve even once struggled to make sense of your life, especially your childhood, you might get more than you’d imagine from reading Love Pour Over Me. You might see the value in taking the time to do the personal, inner work to finally move forward. Additionally, you might fall in love with Raymond, Brenda, Anthony and other characters in Love Pour Over Me. You might get lost in a very good book.

That alone would be worth reading the nearly 300 page novel that is Love Pour Over Me. Six more reasons to read the Love Pour Over Me book are:

  • Authentic friendships – After he arrives to college in Philadelphia, Raymond runs into four men, each hailing from a different part of America or the world. These men become fast friends, developing a bond that celebrity, money, women nor disappointments or secrets can break.
  • Inspiration – Whether you’re reading about Raymond’s childhood and watching a young Raymond interact with his troubled father, Malcolm, or you’re watching Raymond desperately try to keep his heart from Brenda, you may be inspired as you turn the pages of Love Pour Over Me.
  • Passions on display – Short term relationships aren’t the only starring connects in Love Pour Over Me. Raymond and Brenda’s tested romance also isn’t the only “true gem” relationship that survives this book’s shaking challenges.
  • Remarkable success – Raymond is one of America’s top middle distance runners. His is a near matchless athletic talent. But, Raymond’s not alone when it comes to uncommon athletic prowess. Anthony more than holds his own on the football field.
  • Murder mystery – He never asked for it. And yet, Raymond becomes witness to a murder. He also never asked to be closely connected to someone who may have committed the killing.
  • Changed lives – If our lives don’t change, what’s the purpose of contrast? You’ll be surprised at the Raymond who you see at the end of Love Pour Over Me. You might also finally learn to love Raymond’s father, Malcolm.

Give yourself a chance to explore, enjoy and benefit from reading the Love Pour Over Me book

Love Pour Over Me is a novel that recounts Raymond Clarke’s life events. Set in Dayton, Ohio and later Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, a portion of Love Pour Over Me takes place in Africa, namely Madagascar. The 1980s is the time period that the story unfolds in. Think the Los Angeles Lakers, smooth R&B cuts, a non-Internet world (can you imagine?!), closer knit neighborhoods, thriving community bookstores, gas prices being at about $1 a gallon, music videos airing all day and the rise of cable television.

You may have been a young adult, teen, child or not yet born then. As you read Love Pour Over Me, you’ll get to explore a time that saw many inventions and challenges. Most of all, you’ll get to witness the evolution of a man. You’ll get the chance to witness the evolution of a family, five friends and a soul mate couple who, despite their hard setbacks, simply belong together (You’ll know this for certain by the time you reach the last page of the Love Pour Over Me book!) As tough as it was to write at times, I loved creating the book that is Love Pour Over Me. Now I want you to enjoy reading it.

Ready to enjoy a good book? Pick up your copy of Love Pour Over Me in print or ebook form at Amazon.com by clicking – Read Love Pour Over Me

When you have to wait for your dreams to manifest

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By Denise Turney


woman dreaming on her back

Picture by Realt0n12 (Wikimedia Commons)

An unknown person wrote, “Dreams are like stars…you may never touch them, but if you follow them they will lead you to your destiny.” If you’ve ever spent eight or more hours a day, thousands of dollars and more energy than you could measure in pursuit of a dream, there’s a good chance that you’ve missed this point, that you’ve felt frustrated.

Connection between your dreams and your destiny

Yet, you keep motivating yourself. You keep turning your radio dial (seemingly by sheer chance) and finding songs that encourage you to keep pursuing your dream when you absolutely feel like throwing in the towel and quitting. If you didn’t know any better, you might believe that something is guiding you.

What you may not have yet realized is that the pursuit of your dreams is changing you, helping you to awaken. It’s almost like a riddle. Keep going and you could look up and realize that you have stepped right inside your destiny. Yet, like the character in the bestselling book, The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, don’t be surprised if pursuing your dream takes you down roads you never thought you’d journey across.

Stop going after your dream, and you could miss out on memorable experiences. You could lose opportunities to meet friends and supporters, the very people who could go on to leave positive imprints on you. Depending on where you are in pursuit of your dreams, you may understand this or you may feel upset. If you’re feeling frustration, fear or extreme doubt about the fact that your dreams could or will manifest, consider:

  • Meditating for 5 to 10 minutes in the morning and again, at night, before you go to bed
  • Get outside and enjoy a walk (Great ideas have burst through to people while they were outdoors enjoying a walk.)
  • Sleep good at night (You might be surprised at what your dreams reveal to you if you get enough rest.)
  • Be clear about what you want (To get clear, you’re going to have to bid farewell to fear, even if only for a few minutes).
  • Listen to songs and read books that clearly show you that your dreams can come true.
  • Surround yourself with positive, courageous people — the types of people who believe in you and know you can and will step into your destiny.
  • Think back to when you first became aware of your dream. Live with an open mind and remain open to new possibilities.
  • Seek after awakening rather than seeking after feeling “comfortable”.

The latter (seeking after “comfort”) could delay the manifestation of a dream more than any other element, outside of fear. Think about it. When you feel comfortable aren’t you often repeating thoughts, images and events? Aren’t you living the same days over and over? Admittedly, it’s effective at “feeling” like you’re in control, but then something happens (i.e. a loved one transitions, a company closes, your children leave home) to jolt you into the reality that you don’t control everything. Then “comfort” is replaced with anger, depression or more fear.

After awhile, you may learn that stepping into your destiny requires that you trust. I never said that it would always feel easy, but I am saying that it’s worth it.

Trust that Higher Self knows exactly how to bring your dream into the physical realm, and in a way that finds you more awakened to truth.

Get your copy of “Love Pour Over Me” Now at –

http://www.ebookit.com/books/0000001582/Love-Pour-Over-Me.html

Sources:

Amazon.com – http://www.amazon.com/Love-Pour-Over-Me-ebook/dp/B007MC0Z2C

Barnes & Noble – http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/love-pour-over-me-denise-turney/1109600654

 

Love equals freedom

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By Denise Turney



In 1 John chapter four and verses 18 through 19 says, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear. because fear involves punishment. The one who fears has not been perfected in love.” Turn to Genesis chapter 1 and verse 31 and you’ll see, “God saw all that He had made, and behold, it was very good.”

Because God created us, there is nothing to fear. Nothing can usurp the will of God. Nothing can change, remove, abolish or minimize God’s will. The truth of what God is, the truth that God is, the truth that God is eternal and the truth that nothing can alter or stop God’s will may be the greatest good news ever.

Love does not bind because love does not fear

Truth also means that love is forever. Because there is no fear in love, there is no reason to attack, bind or try to make anyone perceive herself or himself as being small. Love does not belittle, make jest of or seek to embarrass. It has no reason to.

Despite what romantic songs say, love does not hurt. Love forgives because it recognizes a mistake and knows that mistakes can and should be corrected, not punished. Love is wise. It knows the outcome across the short and the long term.

Love simply does not fear. Love knows what it is. It is not uncertain. It is not unsure. It does not need to shout or boast. Love’s simple existence is enough.

Love has no puppets because love is freedom

In that rest freedom. It could be why people who dedicate themselves to love speak often, passionately and with conviction about and for freedom.

We are at a point where we have forgotten what love is. We refer to sex as “making love”. Bodies don’t make love. Love is eternal. Bodies aren’t.

We may think that love can become jealous or express itself as jealousy, rage or (again) hurt. Love cannot do those things. But, that doesn’t stop us from using logic to conceal our thought errors and claiming that we are not responsible for how we use our minds in effort to appear innocent.

An example, is when a man says “all men cheat”. Translated – this means, I cannot help what my mind does. I cannot help what my body does. I’m innocent of what I do with my mind because I have absolutely no control of my mind.

If this is truth, a man is merely a puppet. But, whose puppet? And who made man a puppet?

According to Genesis chapter one and verse 31, it wasn’t God.

God made (wo)man free. If nothing can change, diminish or alter God’s will, we have a real dilemma when we seek to avoid taking responsibility for ourselves.

As happens with Raymond Clarke in Love Pour Over Me, it may take us decades to accept that we truly are responsible for ourselves. We are responsible for what we do with our minds. We’re not puppets because we’re not impotent. We’re free.

Get your copy of “Love Pour Over Me” Now at –
http://www.ebookit.com/books/0000001582/Love-Pour-Over-Me.html

Sources:
Amazon.com – http://www.amazon.com/Love-Pour-Over-Me-ebook/dp/B007MC0Z2C
Barnes & Noble – http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/love-pour-over-me-denise-turney/1109600654

Smart Life Choices Lead to More Happiness

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By Denise Turney


woman sitting in window

Wikimedia Commons – Picture by Leonardo Aguiar

 

Choices to more happiness require insight as Raymond Clarke learns in the book, Love Pour Over Me. Getting to more happiness also requires courage.

It’s easy to get stuck in patterns. Before you know it, you start to believe that without patterns (even the wrong patterns), you won’t survive.

Before you know it, you think that being unhappy is normal.

You Can Be Happy – You Deserve Happiness

Explore what causes you to experience happiness. A journal is a good friend to bring along on this exploration.

Write down experiences that cause you to feel angry, afraid, hopeful, under illusion or way too damned dreamy. Also, write down experiences that find you feeling free, light hearted, unafraid and happy.

Listen to friends, colleagues, family and neighbors when they say things like “You seem happy” or “You seem really excited about that”. What are you doing or talking about when people who know you make those comments? It could be a clue to what may bring you more happiness.

Pay Attention to Others for More Happiness Clues

Consider experiences that make most people happy. Reducing work hours, exercising, meditating and singing have long made people happy. So too does participating in a positive hobby (i.e. painting, sculpting, singing, acting, model plane flying) and attending group discussions. Other common activities that induce happiness include soaking in a warm bath, listening to beautiful, soothing music, nature walks, writing in a journal and dancing.

Who knows? Insight could pop up as you are engaging in one of the above activities.

If something deep within directs you to take a specific action, pray about it. Be willing to take action if your True Self directs you to do so. You may not want to get into the habit of resisting taking action on ideas that surface from deep within yourself. Excellence at resisting change could block you from receiving the very experiences that could find you enjoying more happiness.

Be willing to start small if you find yourself resisting change. Take one step that leads you toward what you want and give yourself time to adjust to the change, before you take a larger step, if needed. It’s also important that you remember that parts of you may still be resisting change. This may happen because a part of you thinks a new experience may be just like a previous experience that turned out negatively.

Above all, keep moving forward, again with patience.

Being patient is a sign that you love yourself. Practicing self-love may find you more open to making and taking action on greater choices that lead to more happiness. Stay on the path. There’s no reason why you can’t enjoy the love and happiness that Raymond Clarke steps into as he stays on his path in Love Pour Over Me.

Get your copy of “Love Pour Over Me” Now at –

http://www.ebookit.com/books/0000001582/Love-Pour-Over-Me.html

Sources:

Amazon.com – http://www.amazon.com/Love-Pour-Over-Me-ebook/dp/B007MC0Z2C

Barnes & Noble – http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/love-pour-over-me-denise-turney/1109600654

Real Love, What’s Holding You Back?

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By Rhonda Campbell


love

Wikimedia Commons – Public Domain

Real love is the most desired element in creation and yet, we often think about love through the lens of its complete opposite — fear. Real love quotes are often tinted with fear. Don’t think so? How about, “Real love is always chaotic,” “When love is real, it doesn’t lie, cheat, pretend, hurt you or make you feel unwanted. It’s supposed to be a cure to all your worries,” and “A person that truly loves you will never let you go, no matter how hard the situation is.”

Real Love Doesn’t Happen In The Past

It’s hard to find someone who hasn’t been burned by what they thought was real love in the past. Guess what? It is past experiences and past memories that hold us back from receiving real love. We keep expecting the past to repeat itself.

If you think about everything that you’re scared of, the common denominator might be that the fear is rooted in something that happened in the past. Scared to be abandoned or to feel as if someone else was “chosen” over you?

Were you picked last to join school sports teams? Did a friend choose to play with someone else instead of you when you were a kid? Did a parent transition, walk out or not keep in touch following a divorce?

Fear of rejection or abandonment could worsen if you experienced one or more of the above (or a similar event) several times as a child then experienced a hard breakup as an adult. That includes getting cheated on, manipulated, used or lied to.

What if you’re walking around constantly telling yourself that if you let anyone get close to you the past hurtful experiences will only happen again? How close do you think you’d let people get to you?

When you think about it, it’s a warped form of self-love. It’s also proof that we cannot protect ourselves and open up to love at the same time. There’s too much that we don’t know. There’s too much that we miss.

In fact, as we try to protect ourselves, we could end up blocking or pushing love away.

Just because you’re in a relationship that doesn’t mean that you aren’t avoiding real love. To keep from feeling alone, you could feel desperate to always be in a relationship, but choose partners who mistreat you, people who, like you, are also afraid of love.

Take time to examine your relationships. It’s time well spent. After all, as Real Love by Mary J. Blige says, we’re all looking for real love.

Are they healthy? Do you feel afraid of being abandoned, chosen last, over looked or hurt by your partner? Did anything in the past happen to you that created these emotions?

You could be dragging the past into each present second, and not be aware that you’re living in the past.

As Raymond Clarke learns in Love Pour Over Me, real love and good living require faith and trust. If you’re doing what Raymond was doing in Love Pour Over Me and trying to avoid relationships or closeness, consider trusting that you’ll be cared for by the Creator, your Higher Self or the universe (whichever term you prefer).

Historic Places to Visit in Dayton, Ohio

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dayton ohio skyline

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By Ohio Book Author, Denise Turney

It’s not the largest city in the country, but that doesn’t mean that there aren’t a lot of historic places to visit in Dayton. In fact, Dayton, Ohio is big on history, tradition and achievements. Largely known for the accomplishments of Wilbur and Orville Wright, when many think of Dayton, images of the Wright Patterson Air Force Museum and the Wright Patterson Air Force Base immediately spring to mind.

That happens to me, sometimes, too. Even more, when I think of Dayton, Ohio, I think of home. It’s the city that I was born and raised in. My parents grew up there. All the festivities, delicious food, childhood friendships, family gatherings and holiday traditions that I grew up with take me back to Dayton.

Historic places to explore in Dayton, Ohio

To me, Dayton isn’t a big city, especially when I compare it to Philadelphia and New York. Yet, it is the sixth largest city in Ohio.

About 50 miles North of Dayton is the Queen City, also known as the City by the River — Cincinnati. You’ll have to drive five hours to reach Cleveland and nearby cities, home of talents like The O’Jays, writer Toni Morrison, Arsenio Hall, LeBron James and Hugh Downs.

Visit Dayton, Ohio and you can learn and be entertained while you explore historic places like the Paul Laurence Dunbar Home (this historic site is close to where I grew up), Victoria Theater, the Dayton Art Institute, Carillon Historical Park, Boonshoft Museum of Discovery, SunWatch Indian Village, the Dayton Arcade and the Dayton Daily News Building.

If you venture inside the Dayton Daily News Building, give yourself the day. Research Dayton’s history through real life stories that were captured by some of the city’s insightful journalists. As a history buff, this might be one of the best ways to get to know Dayton, that and inspiring an elder to share stories of their experiences in the city with you.

More historic sites in Dayton, Ohio

Additional historic places to visit in Dayton, Ohio are the Dayton Canoe Club, the Dayton Terra-Cotta Historic District and the Dayton Women’s Club. Other historic places include:

  • Deeds Carillon (My paternal grandmother took us here when we were kids. She loved visiting this area. It was peaceful, with lots of room for kids to play.)
  • Deeds’ Barn
  • Eagles Building
  • Fire Blocks Historic District
  • East Third Street Historic District
  • Oscar M. Gottschall House
  • Graphic Arts Building
  • Jacob O. Joyce House
  • Lindsey Building
  • McCormick Manufacturing Company Building
  • Montgomery County Courthouse
  • Old Post Office and Federal Building
  • John R. Reynolds Home
  • Traxler Mansion
  • Woodland Cemetery Association of Dayton Historic District

Track and field enthusiasts may appreciate visiting Dayton and exploring areas that world champion hurdler, Edwin Moses, grew up in. Travel about thirty minutes from Dayton toward Wilberforce University and you can visit the National Afro-American Museum and Cultural Center.

I can’t say enough about this museum. It is truly worth visiting. They had a 1960s theme when my sister and I visited several years ago. Designs and artifacts were so good that I actually felt like I was back in the 1960s while I was at the museum.

When you think about it, isn’t it amazing how much there is in the city where you grew up or where you live now? After all, you may start to take these places for granted. There’s so much richness within your reach. I encourage you to explore great, historic places if you visit or live in Dayton, Ohio, the city that Raymond Clarke, the main character in the book, Love Pour Over Me, grew up in.

Thank you for reading my blog. To learn what happens to Dayton, Ohio born Raymond Clarke, Brenda and the other characters in Love Pour Over Me, hop over to Amazon.com, B&N.com, Ebookit.com, or any other online or offline bookseller and get your copy of Love Pour Over Me today. And again I say – Thank You! Consider Love.