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How to Prevent Human Trafficking Today

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By Freelance Writer and Books Author Denise Turney

man s hand in shallow focus and grayscale photography plea to prevent human trafficking
Photo by lalesh aldarwish on Pexels.com

You can do more to help prevent human trafficking. Human trafficking is not a third world country problem. It’s also not limited to poor neighborhoods in developed countries. In fact, it could be happening right next door to where you live or a block over from where you live. And this raises a major way to prevent human trafficking.

Modern Slavery Can Happen Anywhere

Recognize that modern slavery can happen anywhere, in every type of neighborhood. Accepting this could help you to spot different forms of trafficking as well as signs that the crime is taking place near you.

As CNN shares, “Slavery can turn up in many forms, and closer to home than you might think.”1 Suburban homes, warehouses, major highways, airports, anywhere people are, there could be modern day slavery.

According to the World Economic Forum, 1 in 4 human labor trafficking victims is a child.2 Forms of trafficking include:

  • Labor (agriculture, manufacturing, retail, construction work, mining, etc.)
  • Forced marriage
  • Military combat
  • Selling counterfeit products
  • Drug smuggling
  • Forced organ donations
  • Prostitution

Listen to Real Life Stories

The number of people impacted by human trafficking is shocking. More than 140 million children have been a victim of this crime, with as many at 48% of child victims forced into labor being between 5 to 11 years old.

When victims speak out about their traumatic experiences with modern slavery, it sheds light on what’s happening right where we all live. Their story sharing exposes a hidden ugly fact about life in the world today.

Removing the cover is one of the best ways to face and deal with what is happening, is a start to doing what it takes to prevent human trafficking. If you want to help prevent human trafficking, consider listening to real life stories of victims.

How to Prevent Human Trafficking

You could also volunteer with an organization that supports people who have escaped modern day slavery. Becoming aware of signs of trafficking is another forward step. However, as you familiarize yourself with some of the signs, stay aware that trafficking could be occurring with a mile or less of where you live.

There is no certain type of person who is a victim, just as there is no certain type of person who commits this horrific crime. Therefore, should you spot a sign, do something. For example, you could call the National Human Trafficking Hotline (888-373-7888). Or you could call 911 (or your country’s emergency response number), Interpol, the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (800-843-5678).

Look for These Signs

Although this list is not all inclusive, it reveals some indicators of forced work, be that work physical or sexual labor. Signs that modern day slavery is occurring include:

  • Withdrawal from family and friends
  • Missing school frequently or no longer attending school at all
  • Abrupt or significant change in behavior
  • Spike in fearfulness in a person
  • Not seeing someone for days, weeks or longer who you normally saw regularly
  • One or more people constantly with the person, as if ensuring that the person does not get free
  • Discomfort while speaking, as if they are repeating what someone is telling them to say
  • Dresses differently
  • Malnourished
  • Unexplainable change in living situation (i.e., lives in a filthy environment or a luxury environment)
  • Bruises and other injuries

More Specific Ways to Prevent Human Trafficking

Here are ways you could help prevent human trafficking or stop it from continuing. Raising awareness at your place of worship, school, on social media, etc. is one prevention step. Other steps include:

  • Watch your child’s online activity, as perpetrators solicit potential victims online.
  • Encourage companies to ensure they work to prevent human trafficking, not get involved in it by having products and/or services created by people forced into slave labor.
  • Call for help for someone you suspect of being trafficked. Do it in a safe way.
  • Shop responsibly, buying products or services, from organizations that deal in fair trade or work to stop forced labor.3
  • Mentor youth thru reliable, ethical organizations.
  • Spend quality time with the young people in your life. Perpetrators often target the emotionally vulnerable.
  • Write your government officials, letting them know that doing what it takes to prevent human trafficking is a priority to you.

Thank You

Should you meet a victim or a survivor, be an advocate. Above all, do something. For instance, you might cross paths with one or more victims while at lunch, shopping or while on vacation.

Sure. Getting involved, will change your life, even if only briefly. But your involvement could save someone’s life. It could be as simple as making a telephone call to 911, the FBI or the National Human Trafficking Hotline (888-373-7888). What you do could help someone heal from this awful adult and childhood trauma.

Clarissa Maxwell, in Escaping Toward Freedom, has to make this choice while she’s on vacation. The choice she makes cost her, but it’s worth it. Lives are changed, however hard the road. Hopefully, what happens in Escaping Toward Freedom sheds more light on the global trauma, encouraging people to take smart actions.

Thank you for what you do to prevent human trafficking.

Resources:

  1. A former child slave speaks: How to stop modern slavery | CNN
  2. How to stop modern slavery | World Economic Forum (weforum.org)
  3. Home – Fair Trade Certified

Danger of Keeping Small Town Secrets Across Generations

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By Freelance Writer and Books Author Denise Turney

empty concrete alleyway in small town
Passageway in Small Town – Photo by Simon Blyberg on Pexels.com

Small town secrets grow like uncontrollable weeds. Their sting is as painful as gossip, yet worse. Unlike gossip, these secrets have a deep, dangerous root. Sexual crimes committed by a star athlete, the whereabouts of a missing person and the deception that a woman is a child’s aunt when she’s actually the child’s mother – those are but a few misplaced confidences with lasting impact.

Small Towns with Old Histories

Other real life skeletons people living in small towns, especially towns with old histories, work hard to keep hidden have affected hundreds of children and adults. Danger associated with these mysteries is what drives people to keep them hidden. If you grew up in a small town that’s known for keeping events in the dark, a few of these mysteries might sound familiar:

  • College hazing that went too far, causing the death of a student, but no one going to trial because the death was ruled an accident and the crime was never properly investigated
  • Neighbor installing hidden camera in a home then using taped information to blackmail the homeowner for acts as simple as showering, relieving themselves and making out with a town schoolteacher
  • Corruption that stems back two or more generations, putting dishonest law enforcement and other government officials in place to keep the corruption going
  • Drugs taking over an entire town, destroying families and businesses while community leaders do nothing to stop the drug infiltration because they’re receiving kickbacks from dealers
  • A handful of business owners meeting and deciding which new businesses will open in the town, cooking up reasons to disallow the strongest competitors from setting up shop
  • Two married people have a lengthy affair, creating a child from the relationship, only to lie to the child about his real parents, not once telling their son their biological connection to him. People who know about the affair and who the child’s real parents are, never tell the child, not even after the child reaches adulthood.

Shocking Small Town Secrets

It’s these types of secrets that get the wrong men and women arrested, that leave children with more questions than answers and that prevent real growth from happening to the town. Believe it or not, some small town secrets are more outlandish and traumatic than those unearthed in large cities.

The real shocker is that small towns with big secrets can look “perfect” from the outside. Everybody knows everybody. Instead of passing one another on the sidewalk without speaking while out shopping, townsfolk stop, wave and chat with each other awhile.

If you didn’t know better, the entire town would look and feel like one big, happy family. Stay in the place long enough and you start to notice relationships and events that are off, that just don’t feel right. You spot a prominent business owner entering a hotel at the edge of town with a minister’s wife only to tell his own wife that he and the minister’s wife are mapping out the details of the summer’s vacation Bible school.

Everyone Knows What You Keep Lying About

Everyone in town knows the businessman rarely goes to church, but no one questions the lie. The chance to live in a place where wrong, particularly seemingly unforgiveable wrongs, don’t occur seems like sufficient motivation to lie, deny the facts and support tragic secrets.

At their worse, small town secrets can conceal a murder. Destroyed evidence, bribes paid to a coroner and a judge and threats made to those seeking the truth, can do more than hide facts. Acts like these can ensure that the wrong man goes to prison.

But why do people tell lies or keep secrets, especially dangerous hidden facts? Desire to mask their own indiscretions is a primary reason. Fear of retaliation from powerful people is another.

Together these two can create a web that’s hard to get untangled from. Greasy Plank in Memphis, Tennessee is a town of secrets, dark mysteries. Religion won’t save Greasy Plank residents.

Break Free

If you grew up keeping secrets, it might be time to break free. Doing so can release positive energy, allowing you to start and finish work you’ve wanted to do for years, but never seemed to find the strength to get to.

Here are more rewards associated with letting small town secrets go, float away like rocks moving down river:

  • Restored relationships with people wrongly suspected of crimes
  • Freedom from unforgiveness
  • Independence from resentment and suspicion
  • Healing from trauma
  • Innocent children and adults regaining their honor

And most of all, wrongs finally made right. Oh, and another advantage. You can sleep at night, your mind lighter from no longer having to carry heavy secrets. Tammy Tilson in Spiral fights for these rewards, for herself and her family, but she has a lot to lose if she tells what she knows.

Her choice to keep small town secrets has a very high price. Yet, that’s the way it goes when you try to hide the truth. Should you be keeping secrets, especially from yourself, consider the weight you’re carrying. See if you can find a way into the light of the truth. You might be able to do it in a way that frees up more people than you know without causing more trauma, more harm.

Resources:

  1. Small Town Secrets – NBC Boston

Achieving Real Success While Living Through Change

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By Books Author and Freelance Writer Denise Turney

man upset about change pushing carton boxes with negative words to avoid real success
Photo by SHVETS production on Pexels.com

Real success is birthed in adaptability. Unfortunate events, ranging from scams, sickness, relationship problems and job stress, can stop your progress if you let them. To stay sharp, you have to adapt. This applies to good change too. After all, it’s not just undesirable experiences that create emotional and behavioral challenges.

This is due, in part, to how your brain works. Your brain is a complex organ that works hard to protect you. At first glance, that may sound like a win-win. Yet, it comes with results that could produce mental blocks and resistance to change.

Thrive – Getting Beyond Survival

Forbes puts it this way, “The key aim of the brain is survival.” Furthermore, “unpredictability and uncontrollability, in particular, create a malicious combination with which our brain finds it extremely difficult to deal. This in return further elevates stress levels and produces undesirable emotions that we would rather avoid.”1

Should this happen, you might feel a range of emotions. Even more, your perceptions about the world, people and relationships could shift, maybe improve or become disruptive. If you struggle during change, your heartbeat might hasten. Or your appetite might shift significantly. Other changes you could experience include temporary memory fog (where you find it difficult to remember people’s names, etc.), a harder time focusing, lack of engagement or connectivity.

Although these experiences may be related to challenges in adjusting to undesirable change, they could also occur if you undergo change after you receive something that you’ve long wanted. Today’s world offers countless opportunities to improve your adaptability skills, positioning yourself to smoothly leap change hurdles and enjoy real success.

Signs You Resist Change

Resisting change can feel magical, like a trick. You convince yourself that you can stop change. And if you can’t stop change, you tell yourself that you can limit the impact that change has on you. The problem is you’re living in a world of constant change.

Keep resistance to change up and you might exhaust yourself. Even more, you’ll stop yourself from experiencing sustained real success. More pronounced signs that you resist change include:

  • You stop showing up for projects, relationship conversations, financial talks, etc. that require change
  • Negativity becomes your trademark
  • Nostalgia is a dominant emotion you experience
  • When you consider “good times,” you’re thinking about the past
  • Gossiping about leaders championing change becomes normal for you
  • “This is the way we’ve always done things” is a familiar phrase you speak

If the this was a world where very little changed second-by-second, your resistance may yield a reward. But because the world is always changing, constantly, this type of resistance doesn’t pay off in good ways.

Tips to Achieve Real Success with Change

Here are specific ways to achieve real success while living with change. If you resist change, consider adding two or more of these actions into your day.

  • Learn something new every day. Practicing awareness is a quick learning path. Simply pay attention to what’s happening inside of you and around you.
  • Break a habit once a quarter. Train your brain to expect and smoothly adjust to change.
  • Monitor your results. For example, if you’re improving your budget and dealing with rising rent, you could identify two to three expenses that you could reduce or eliminate to counter the increase, so you’re overall monthly expenses remain flat or potentially lower. Track how you’re staying free of spending money in these two three areas.
  • Stay curious. You were curious as a kid; revisit the practice.
  • Create new solutions to deal with change. This could help you break habits that produce unwanted results.
  • Be honest. Accept what you see and keep adjusting until you’re living the life you want.
  • Meditate and move outdoors. These two steps can calm your brain.
  • Read good books and get sufficient quality sleep each night.

You Can Do It!

Anywhere you go, there’s change. Even if you stick to a routine religiously, you will encounter change. There are job changes that range from workload to types of work you do. Rising rents might motivate you to move. Then, there are relationship changes from breakups to makeups to new relationships.

The list goes on. On top of that, some changes are temporary, allowing you to bounce back to a former state. Other changes, like a loved one transitioning, are permanent. As you go through change, it may help to remember that none of us is in control of the universe.

Additionally, it might be helpful to remember that you are always loved and cared for. This is one of the harder truths to remember when you’re moving through great change. The good news is that, as previously shared, you can achieve real success while navigating change. Here’s to your success!

Resources
1. How To Optimize The Brain’s Response To Change (forbes.com)

13 Reasons Why Books Make the Best Gifts

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And Why You Should Buy Books for Your Best Friends

By Freelance Writer and Books Author Denise Turney

woman lying down on grass beside opened books
Photo by Marcelo Chagas on Pexels.com

Books make the best gifts for a bounty of reasons. Art and entertainment are just two good reasons why your friends love to get books as gifts. Other reasons are hidden gems, to them and to you. Chance to improve your friend’s cognitive abilities is just a start, a benefit with long lasting effects. Then, there’s the psychological and emotional benefits.

Fascinating Artwork Pops

Let’s start with art!

A rare and skillful artist’s pen has helped to craft the artwork on the finest of book covers. Who thinks of paintings, drawings and sketches while shopping for books to give as gifts? Yet, it’s often the artwork on the cover that attracts your eye, isn’t it?

Explosion of vibrant, rich colors. Smooth or rugged texture. Moving shadows and odd, unique shapes. Admittedly, there are book covers so masterfully created that they are a work of art all by themselves.

Check out these winning book covers. See if you can spot what attracts thousands of readers to these covers. Are any of them your favorite, just for the cover alone?

the great gatsby by f scott fitzgerald cover
elskede by toni morrison book cover artwork
george orwell books as gifts 1984 book cover
the stargazers sister by carrie brown book gifts great book covers
books as gifts book cover artwork by terry mcmillan

13 Reasons Books Make the Best Gifts

As if highly crafted artwork isn’t enough, here are 13 more reasons why books make the best gifts. If you read merely for entertainment, several of these advantages might surprise you:

  1. Stronger brain – While reading, the brain’s visual cortex is activated. The temporal lobe and frontal lobe are other parts of the brain that are activated while you read.1
  2. Better empathy – The ability to understand and relate to another person based on emotions they’re experiencing is sharpened while reading good books. How so? Reading stories that spark emotionally charged memories, gets the limbic system fired up. Link loving emotions to a scene in a novel about forgiveness, romance or happiness and you could improve your ability to relate to people in real-life.
  3. Faster learning – Read more, learn more and faster. The more you read, the easier it is to comprehend what’s being shared on the page.
  4. Rewires the brain – Iris Reading shares that reading, “makes the brain rewire itself and creates white matter, making communication within the brain efficient.”2
  5. Improves memory – To pull this one off, read books that challenge what you already know. Pulitzer Prize winning authors dig deep into the human condition. These authors also use complicated sentence structure to convey a message, enough complication to challenge you as you read.
  6. Broader vocabulary – Back to those challenging novels and nonfiction books. Keep reading stories that challenge your current understanding, and watch your vocabulary grow.

Treasure These Rewards

Looking for more reasons to treat your family and friends to great stories? Here you go!

  1. Choose Education – Who doesn’t love to learn! Reading books is a low-cost way to expand your education. When you think about it, there’s hardly a classroom, postsecondary course or certificate-granting webinar that doesn’t require you to read a book to complete the training.
  2. Unleash your imagination – Science fiction and fantasy novels aren’t the only stories that free your imagination, letting your wildest dreams feel alive. Facts and history tidbits you read in nonfiction books rev up your imagination too.
  3. Positive mood shifts – Just like it’s impossible for most people to multi-task, it’s impossible to place equal focus on a project or concern and the pages of a good book. Start reading positive literature, and you could go from feeling angry or anxious to feeling hopeful and happy.
  4. Enjoy a good night of sleep – You don’t even have to read a lot of books to relax and start drifting into the sweetest sleep, fading memories of the last pages of an intriguing story still in your thoughts. If you’re an avid reader, you know how sweet sleep can be after you’ve been reading for entertainment for two to three hours.

The Gift That Keeps on Giving

  1. Great media alternative – Imagine seeing an exciting or soothing story scene pop up instead of a negative news piece two to three times a week. What impact do you think that switch would have on your mental health and overall emotional wellbeing?
  2. Deeper dive – A sure way to get to the heart of a situation, historic or modern, is to read through personal journals, history books, biographies and autobiographies.
  3. Inexpensive gifts – E-books cost as little as $.99. Paperbacks, including brand new paperbacks, can be purchased for as little as $5. It’s hard for other gifts to compete with the benefits gained from reading books and their low costs.

Major Reason Books Make the Best Gifts

Not every gift offers 13 benefits, and at such low cost. It really is hard to top books when it comes to gift giving and for so many wonderful reasons! Yet, most of all, the good you gain from reading books stays with you.

Honestly, what gifts offer rewarding effects that stay with you like the effects gained from reading books? You don’t even have to keep a physical book at your side to enjoy the benefits. It’s not like wearing a coat, suit, hat or dress.

Pick stories that your friends and family absolutely love, and you’ll send the message that you care. Select stories the people in your life love, and you’ll let those people know you’re paying attention. It sends the message that you know what they like, and that you’re willing to do the good it takes to make them happy.

It’s Getting Easier as Books Make the Best Gifts

Now, that isn’t to say that finding the right titles for your friends is always easy. Fortunately, booksellers, particularly indie and local bookstore owners, know hundreds of titles that might make a perfect gift. If you’re in luck, you might live in an area that hosts a book fair around the holidays.

Talk about a shortcut to good book gifts. Who knows. You might even get these printed gifts autographed by the authors, potentially increasing the gift’s value. This gain is year-round. After all, new books are published every day.

Good stories, from classics to contemporary stories to the best nonfiction, make great birthday, anniversary, retirement and holiday gifts. The next time you sit down and enjoy a good story, ask yourself if it wouldn’t be sweet to share that experience with a friend by gifting them with a similar experience, all through the pages of a book.

Resources:

  1. Areas of the brain involved in reading and writing – Psychology Info (psychology-info.com)
  2. What Happens In The Brain While Reading? | Iris Reading

A Mystery, What If You Can’t Let the Departed Go

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By Freelance Writer and Mystery Writer Denise Turney

blue sea visit to say goodbye to departed loved ones
Photo by Moisés Pereira on Pexels.com

It’s hard enough to let the departed go after a funeral or homegoing service. Even if you consider yourself a spiritual person, you can’t deny that there’s been a huge shift. Communicating with your loved one who has left their body will either end or take great work to continue.

Leaving Your Body Is Not the End

If you believe you’re an eternal being, you know that leaving a body is not the end. On the other hand, if you believe that the only reality is a fleshly existence, the departure is permanent. Regardless of your belief, there’s been a great change. And you have to deal with it.

Remembering your loved one, instead of working to forget them, is a way to maneuver through the change. Looking for ideas? To keep your loved one’s memory alive, you could:

  • Write a letter to express emotions related to your relative or friend
  • Create a collage with pictures of fun times shared between you two
  • Talk with relatives and friends about the departed
  • Frame a picture of your loved one and keep it in your living space
  • Light a candle for someone dear to you who has transitioned

Also, allow yourself to laugh and smile at happy memories. For sure, it might take work, but start to move through guilt feelings and guilt thoughts. Begin to treasure the sweet memories that you created with your loved one.

Dealing with Trauma or Grief

This is where watching home videos, reading cards from your departed friend and re-reading a letter could prove helpful. The key is not to depend on these experiences. After all, nothing is forever or permanent in this world, including routines you make to deal with trauma or grief.

Other smart actions you could take to move through grief and let the departed go are below. As with other life experiences, go with what works for you.

  • Hold an annual memorial to honor your loved one. For instance, you could hold a private or a public memorial on your loved one’s birthday. This happens with departed entertainers and other celebrities.
  • Visit a cool spot that your loved and you frequented on a special day once a year
  • Add your friend to your artistic work. As an example, you could include your friend’s name in a poem, short story or play that you write. Or you could paint a picture of your friend.
  • Keep in touch with relatives of your loved one. Do this in healthy ways and with the agreement of the relatives.

Messages from Beyond

Depending on your beliefs and abilities, you could receive messages from beyond. Should you be a gifted seer, you might receive messages from beyond from someone you don’t know. In this case, the process to let the departed go could extend into the unknown.

A young girl named Carolyn deals with this in Spiral. Her experience is similar to what other people with the ability to be a seer have shared. “I felt another presence, like I wasn’t alone,” some people who receive messages from beyond say.

Another experience these people share is how they “heard people’s names, dates, places like cities and streets” they’d never heard about before. These cases may occur because there’s an unresolved issue, which raises a good point.

What if it wasn’t you, but the departed, who was having trouble letting go?

What Happens in Ghost

Ghost is a popular movie that deals with this. At first, Demi Moore’s character moves right into grieving, a healthy step. After all, delaying grieving might seem safe, protecting you from strong emotions, but it won’t keep you from realizing that someone you love is no longer here.

Then, strange phenomena start to occur. Unwillingness to turn away from what’s happening and clear memories about her partner, key Moore’s character, Molly Jensen, into the fact that she could be hearing from her loved one. Together, Molly and her departed loved one, a man named Sam Wheat, solve a murder.

Following through on what Sam shares with her is the only way that Molly will get to peace. She becomes as emotional as Sam is to solve the mystery. Fortunately, Molly does find who murdered her boyfriend, Sam. After that, both Molly and Sam are free. It truly was a loving way that Molly let the departed go, so he could continue his journey.

Love People While They’re Here

If we’re truly nonphysical beings, it’s not impossible to think that a departed loved one could connect. Just as they would if they were still in their body, a loved one could seek help to resolve an issue they were unable to close while they were here. Carolyn is up for the task in Spiral. For her, a 10-year-old girl, it’s as if she has no choice.

Choices this young girl makes help more than the departed let go and enter peace. Her works influence an entire town, opening up the possibility for generations to live free. Carolyn gets it.

Unresolved issues could make it hard to let the departed go. Therefore, take it easy on yourself. Treat the people in your life, including strangers, with love. Appreciate people you say you love. Say what you want to say, rooted in love. Let people know how much they mean to you. Share your love. Be kind, thankful and caring.

After all, this world is a mystery. One day, you’ll have to let it go. Loving everyone you meet can make the process easier for you and the people who cross your path.

Signs Someone in Your Family is Your Best Friend

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By Freelance Writer and Book Author Denise Turney

two family friends laughing at each other
Photo by Laura Stanley on Pexels.com

It’s sweet when someone in your family is your best friend, especially if you grew up with this relative. Know them since you were a toddler and you have loads of history. You’ve been there for each other nearly every step of the way.

The Best Friend Who Makes You Feel Accepted

Because you know each other so well, there’s often no need to explain your opinions, beliefs or ambitions to them. Another gain is that you don’t have to work to be your “authentic self” while you’re with your family friend. Hanging out with them is a great way to feel accepted, like you belong.

That alone is strength, is empowering.

Despite these advantages, you might not think of a relative as your best friend. Even more, you might not know who in your family is your best friend. That person could be your parent, an aunt, an uncle, cousin, grandparent or a sibling.

Signs Someone in Your Family is Your Best Friend

They might even be someone who became part of your family through marriage. Signs a relative is your best friend include:

  • You laugh a lot when you’re with them, the knee slapping rib busting kind of laughing
  • Sharing a secret with them is easy
  • When you’re with them, you feel loved
  • Your energy shifts into a better space when you two are together
  • Going days without communicating with them isn’t something you want to do
  • If you’re in a jam, they are among the first people you call
  • Both of you turn to each other for advice
  • Vacationing together is fun
  • Family get togethers are events you look forward to as it gives you a chance to hang out someone in your family who is your best friend

You’re Not Alone

A friend keeps you from feeling like you’re alone in the world. Having just one person in your life who makes you feel like you belong can boost your confidence and give you hope. When you feel like you belong, you can also:

  • Reduce your stress levels
  • Improve your sense of worth
  • Sleep better at night
  • Face mistakes you’ve better with confidence
  • Realize how alike you are to other people
  • Cope with challenges better
  • Avoid feeling deep loneliness
  • Live life with a sense of support
  • Feel empowered to ask for help
  • Know someone loves being with you, loves your company

Someone in Your Family You Trust

This world is full of ups and downs, constant change. It’s impossible to know what’s coming next every second of every day. To get through the world’s ongoing shifts, you might need to talk with someone you trust, you might need to talk through plans with someone who has your best interest at heart. A family member who’s your best friend gives you a quick ear, someone to bounce ideas off.

When someone in your family is your best friend, you also have someone you trust who you can discuss personal issues with. Instead of calling or texting a neighbor, colleague or classmate and hoping that they won’t spread intimate details you share with them, when a family member is your best friend, you can relax and know what you share won’t become gossip.

After all, you’ve both shared private details with each other for years. If neither of you has ever shared these private details with another relative, there’s a comforting shelter of trust that when you ask, “please don’t tell anyone else” your request will be honored.

Family Friends Offer Relationship Stability

When you’re sharing dating details, relationship troubles, vacation exploits and fun and games with your relative friend, it could all end in laughter. Let misfortune arise, something like a bad health diagnosis, and don’t be surprised if you weep absent embarrassment with your relative friend.

You might ask them to accompany you to your future doctor visits. It could be a good way to shield yourself from emotional and psychological hurt. And again, having this relative friend with you could keep you from feeling alone.

The older you get — or put another way, the more time you spend in this world — the more you might see the value in relationships. Even in this ever-changing world, good relationships offer the most stability.

So, consider letting the person in your family who is your best friend know how much you appreciate them. Tell them how happy you are that, in addition to being family, they care enough to be your best friend. It’s what makes family real sweet.

How to Help African American Women with Breast Cancer

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By Inspirational Books Author Denise Turney

photo of smiling african american woman with natural hair holding white flower
Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels.com

There is something about sickness and death that can make you want to hide, keep what’s happening to you secret. Yet, hiding and living with anxiety and fear doesn’t stop the progression of a disease. Facing a disease like breast cancer doesn’t make the process easier either, but it can lead to healing. If you reach out and do research, you’ll find that there is help for African American women with breast cancer.

Actions to Help African American Women with Breast Cancer

As with other diseases, education is a good start. Organizations like Sisters Network, Inc., Black Women’s Health Imperative, African American Breast Cancer Alliance and Susan G. Komen for the Cure offer educational materials you can read and learn more about what might be happening to your body. The American Cancer Society shares research work on prevention, treatments, childhood cancer and how the disease responds to other issues like COVID.

Regarding the power of knowledge, among the actions to help African American women with breast cancer, there is:

  • Virtual and in-person training to help reduce fear, as you become aware of what to expect during testing, treatment and recovery
  • Sharing the importance of performing monthly self-breast exams (a lot of women discover breast irregularities during self-exams)
  • Knowledge about what happens during mammograms, including questions to ask screeners and your physician
  • Information on where to get free mammogram screenings and other breast cancer support free of charge

Training and Prevention, Healing for African American Women with Breast Cancer

In addition to knowledge, training is important. You may need training to perform monthly self-exams effectively. Regular monthly self-breast exams can be performed in the shower or in another private area. After performing several exams, it will be easier to notice changes in the shape or feel of your breasts.

This leads to more ways to help African American women with breast cancer. Some of the ways had been previously mentioned. They are other support actions include:

  • Training from a healthcare practitioner (Your OBGYN is a great start. It’s important to partner with an OBGYN who you feel comfortable talking to about your body.)
  • Monthly self-breast exams (Getting to know your body is important.)
  • Mammograms (The American Cancer Society and The National Cancer Institute can help you find resources to get free or low-cost mammograms. Additionally, your OBGYN might know where you can get free or low-cost mammograms. Some employers also provide free exams.)
  • Treatment options (Discuss treatment options, including financial support that may be available for treatment options.)
  • Diet (A lot can change when you discover you have a disease like breast cancer. Path to healing might come, in part, through diet. Consider working with a dietician to learn how what you feed your body affects your overall health, including your emotional health.)

You Caring Means a Lot

If you’re a relative or friend of someone who’s dealing with breast cancer, your care means a lot. Just knowing that you care and are willing to invest the time and support to help a friend with breast cancer means a lot.

Of all the ways to help African American women with breast cancer simply being there, over the long run, might be an immeasurable gift. More ways that you could help are to:

  • Offer rides to doctor visits
  • Drive your relative or friend to and from treatments
  • Help care for or babysit young children
  • Attend support group meetings with your relative or friend
  • Pray with and for your friend
  • Cook meals for your friend. You could even prepare meals that are stored in the freezer, so all your friend has to do is put enough food in the oven to dine on for a day.

Get Permission and Keep Reaching Out

Because each person is different, get your family member’s or friend’s permission to help. However, if you see your friend or family member is struggling and trying to go it alone, continue to offer support. Calling and stopping by your relative’s or friend’s home just to say “Hello” is a way to show that you’re there and willing to be a support.

Just being there and listening is such a gift. Organizations that help African American women with breast cancer are in the resources section below. There are many other organizations that you can turn to, including local organizations, that help African American women with breast cancer. Some of these organizations might be affiliated with a local hospital or treatment center.

Resources:

  1. Sisters Network Inc. – https://www.sistersnetworkinc.org
  2. Black Women’s Health Imperative – https://bwhi.org
  3. African American Breast Cancer Alliance – http://aabcainc.org
  4. American Cancer Society – https://www.cancer.org
  5. Susan G. Komen for the Cure – https://www.komen.org

Easy Shortcuts to a Better Life

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By Books Author Denise Turney

blackboard with your life matters writing related to shortcuts for better living
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Easy shortcuts to a better life are linked to rest, peace and greater satisfaction. These shortcuts help you to live in your natural state, more in tune with how you were created to live. Think about it. As a child who was loved, you may have spent hours, if not entire days, in a cocoon of love, peace and restfulness. Yet, by the time you entered kindergarten, your habit of living in peace, love and restfulness may have started to slip.

Other People’s Expectations

Gone are days spent enjoying being alive. Enter in other people’s expectations of what you “should do” and “ought to be” like. Once this happens, it’s not enough to just be yourself. An invisible “ruler” of what a good kid is like, what your parents or caregivers most want you to mirror and other people’s hopes for the specific personality that you should develop starts to show up and solidify.

Before you know it, you start glancing at other people, monitoring their approval or disapproval of you. Spot someone frowning in your direction, and you might hang your head. Let someone smile at you, and your head and shoulders rise. During those instances of external approval, it’s easy to feel good.

If only this world were filled with nothing except people who appreciate you. Easy shortcuts to a better life might be a snap then.

Key Shortcut

Think about it. Are you more confident while surrounded by friends or while in the company of a crowd who has repeatedly made it clear to you that you are not enough? Furthermore, each instance when you felt insecure, uncertain and uncomfortable were you either recalling an experience when you felt unaccepted and unloved or were you being disapproved of in that present moment?

This brings up one of the easy shortcuts to a better life. To step into your better life, commit right now to consistently give yourself love. It doesn’t matter what another person says. Regardless of how anyone else looks at you, gossips about you or judges you, love yourself. Put your commitment into practice and you’ll always be loved.

Forget dismissing the importance of this act. The love that you give yourself is as valuable as the love that you receive from others. Love covers all, is whole and complete and has no variation. In other words, love that flows through you is as good as love that flows through your best friend, neighbor or anyone. So, love yourself. You’ll be taking a reliable shortcut to a better life.

What Do You Really Want?

Other easy shortcuts to a better life are to consider what you really want. Because you’ve likely received verbal and nonverbal messages from others about what they’d like for you to do with your life, you might think that you know what you really want when, in fact, you might not know. Instead, you might have spent the last 10 years working hard to be what you think someone you admire (or someone who you’re afraid of) wants you to be.

That’s definitely not the path to happiness and inner peace. Should that be the track that you’ve been living on, it’s time to start moving down a different path.

Get clear about what you really want – what you really want, not want someone else wants for you. Also, start to map out specific actions you could take to get what you really want.

Explore What You Really Want

For example, if you want to open a bookstore, start to map out how to find and build relationships with book distributors, wholesalers, publishers and hybrid authors, and identify realtors who have experience locating retail buildings in the areas that attract large numbers of book buyers.

Additionally, you could contact your local chamber of commerce and find out the specific business licenses that you need. That’s just a start. Each action that you take brings you closer to what causes you to experience joy.

More Easy Shortcuts to a Better Life

More easy shortcuts to a better life follow. Check them out. See if they aren’t easy to implement.

  • Revisit activities that you loved as a kid. Age and time are no reasons to eliminate daily fun from your life.
  • Read a good book, the kind of book that’s so good you can’t help but tell all your friends about it.
  • Explore the great outdoors. Get outside and have loads of natural fun! This is a favorite of the easy shortcuts to a better life.
  • Schedule time to hang out with friends one or more times a month. Don’t let a busy schedule rob you of opportunities to be with your friends.
  • Go for a drive to an area you’ve never been to before. You might be surprised at how being in a new environment picks you up.
  • Try your hand at the arts. After all, self-expression is one of the easy shortcuts to a better life.

Keep Seeking Easy Shortcuts to a Better Life

Honesty is a must to get from where you are now to the life that you truly want to live. Keep seeking more ways to tap into your inner peace and joy. Ideas about new actions that you could take to experience an increasingly good and better life might come as you travel.

In this situation, you might see someone living a full life while doing something you’ve yet to do. Exercise enough courage to try the new thing and you might find another way to shorten the time it takes to live a life that finds you feeling better, more vibrant and more alive.

So, get out and explore. Try new things. Meet new people. Laugh. Add a spirit of newness to each day. It’s your life. Make it wonderful!

How Busy Entrepreneurs Are Finding Inner Peace

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By Books Writer Denise Turney

photo of women stretching together doing exercise for inner peace
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Despite challenges, busy entrepreneurs are finding inner peace. It takes creativity and flexibility, but it can be done. Creativity and flexibility are must because entrepreneurs juggle a seemingly endless list of to-dos.

Sales, improved return on investment (ROI), attracting the right human capital and increasing productivity are areas that small business entrepreneurs focus on day in and day out. When sales are up and ROI is good, these focus areas can send entrepreneurs, including owners of indie bookstores, into a wave of euphoria. It’s easy to feel at peace then. Yet, the world of operating a small business isn’t always smooth.

Stressors for Small Business Owners

There’s turnover, eroding team morale, economic headwinds and fierce product competition to deal with. During these times, small business owners’ stress levels can skyrocket. Even the most resilient entrepreneur can feel overwhelmed after living through just three weeks of employee resignations, a drop in sales and a pick-up in customer complaints.

That’s why smart entrepreneurs do more than seek paths from nagging stress to inner peace, they find stress reduction shortcuts. Although each person is different, following are some paths that entrepreneurs have taken to reduce stress:

  • Stay focused on long-term goals. As a bookseller, if I’ve heard this once, I’ve heard it a thousand times. Keep your sights on the long-term goals. Admittedly, the capacity to pull this off relies a lot on the next stress reduction step.
  • Believe that they can succeed. It’s not enough to keep your sights on long-term goals. You actually need to believe that you can be successful doing what you love. You really have to believe it.
  • Strong financial habits. This applies at the individual and business levels. To operate with inner peace, entrepreneurs know what to invest in and what to turn away from. Additionally, they pay employees, consultants and freelancers based on what their business can sustain long-term.

Keys to How Entrepreneurs Are Finding Inner Peace

Staying in balance and at peace is no small trick. Hence, the reason entrepreneurs committed to living in peace have a dozen or more tools in their kit, including:

  • Determination is a must. To keep stress down and to deal with stress in healthy ways, they are determined. Simply put, determination fuels entrepreneurs through a major mistake. As an example, if your sales team closed 35% more deals over the last two years than at any other time in your company’s history and you started celebrating too soon or celebrated for too long only to see large clients exit, it’s your determination to succeed that could surface new ideas. This very example has happened. And it’s understandable. After all, sales are why you’re a for-profit organization. You should celebrate. To keep your bottom line strong, you should also keep your eye on your existing customers and not just celebrate each new customer who walks through the door. Focusing too much on either and not enough on the other could cost you large chunks of business.
  • Persistence is a must-have in a successful entrepreneur’s toolkit. While they persist, busy entrepreneurs are sure to be flexible. The last thing they will do is persist with a tactic that’s never going to work. Yet, they don’t give up. Instead, they are willing to look at the situation differently. They’re also willing to ask others for insight. Getting input from the right people opens them up to new opportunities, new ideas and more success.

Organic Paths to Inner Peace

As beneficial as these stress reducers are, there are more ways that busy entrepreneurs are finding inner peace. These next steps are good for business; they also have a positive impact on business owners’ overall health. Try adding one to three of these steps into your day, even if you own an indie bookstore and face days crammed with meetings with bookstore buyers, authors, publishing companies, distributors, publicists and marketing reps.

  • Get outside, move and breathe. Entrepreneurs serious about finding inner peace, get outside regularly. Regardless of where their business is located, they find creative ways to get outside year-round. While outside, they might enjoy a 30-minute walk. Or they might dine outdoors with a friend, ride a bike or exercise at a nearby gym that has an outdoor workout area.
  • Feed their body nourishing food and beverages. This means they might have to go with fresh water with a slice of lemon for lunch and dinner meetings. Eating green, leafy vegetables and fresh fruits that agree with their body is a priority.

More Ways Busy Entrepreneurs Are Finding Inner Peace

  • Meditate. Yes. Entrepreneurs are finding inner peace through appreciation. They appreciate simply sitting down and being still. They might start off by sitting still for two minutes in the morning and another two minutes at night. If that seems too long, they might start with one minute in the morning and another minute of stillness at night and work their way up to five to ten minutes twice a day. Not only can meditating bring entrepreneurs more inner peace, but meditating can help surface new business growth ideas.
  • Invest in a good night of sleep. Going to bed at the same time and reducing blue light in their bedrooms are ways entrepreneurs improve sleep. So too is drinking organic cherry juice or eating cherries, as cherries have natural melatonin. Perhaps above all, entrepreneurs are finding inner peace by working through conflicts an hour or more before they head to bed, giving their mind time to unwind.

Trust The Process

As simple as it sounds, they also seek help. That’s right. Entrepreneurs are finding inner peace by asking business partners to take on certain responsibilities. This one might be tough at the start of their careers, especially if they’re accustomed to handling critical projects themselves. Over time, they learn that as their business continues to grow, they need to start delegating.

Even more, for these business owners, seeking help aligns with trust. Since no one can succeed in an island-business environment, they learn early that they have to trust others.

Using an indie bookstore as an example, bookstore owners trust the delivery drivers to get new books to their stores. And they trust utility workers to ensure that the lights are on at their stores. Another event that they trust is the flow of book buyers into their bookstores. When it comes to stress reduction and inner peace, trusting the process (after they’ve done their best) is paramount.

Resources:

entrepreneur.com/article/271055

What’s So Great About Growing Up in the 1980s

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By Inspirational Writer and Books Author Denise Turney

photo of red haired woman with afro laughing
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The 1980s is a favorite decade for millions of people and for good reason. It was the decade of the fax machine, handheld video games, the Walkman, video players and VHS movies, calculator watches, office superstores and road races. For homeowners who’d previously spent years climbing a ladder and painting a four-story house beneath the heat and humidity of a harsh summer sun, the growing popularity of house siding was a most welcomed trend.

Convenience Makes the 1980s Favorite Decade

My paternal grandparents took advantage of house siding. Gone were the days of my grandfather climbing up to the roof in the unrelenting heat of summer to chip old paint off the house, so that he could apply a smooth, fresh coat of paint to their house. It’s this that brings up a good point.

Much of what you love about the 1980s, especially if you grew up during the 1980s, may link to a welcomed convenience. With this in mind, it’s clear that each 10 years will likely produce a favorite decade, especially as advancing technologies afford us more convenience. But back to the 1980s, that sweet time. In addition to the previously mentioned gems, newly developed products and services that help to make the 1980s a favorite decade include:

  • Compact discs
  • DNA advancements
  • Disposable cameras
  • Personal computers
  • Answering machines
  • Enhancement of home security systems
  • Fitness clubs
  • Music videos

1980s Entertainment

Reality television, the godmother of much of today’s social media videos, took off during the 1980s. Back then, it was common to find yourself growing up watching shows like MTV’s The Real World. If nothing else, those early television shows served as proof that humans find each other remarkably interesting.

Reality television offered an air of authenticity that viewers may have found missing from soap operas. When it comes to sports, Sunday afternoon remained the biggest day of the week, especially as it regards professional football. The Pittsburgh Steelers “steel curtain” wasn’t as formidable as it had been during the 1970s, but it still felt good rooting for the team.

Finding your favorite movies was as easy as walking inside your local Blockbuster video store. During those “modern times”, it seemed as if Blockbuster would dominate the movie rental industry for decades. Considering that you had complete control over the types and numbers of movie videos that you rented, watching favorite movies could be as cheap as $5.

Remembering The 1980s Great Outdoors Pursuits

There were no streaming fees or cable television monthly rates to deal with. That could be why kids played outside, having fun engaging in a game of kickball, basketball, baseball or dodgeball with friends. You might have to rewind the clock in your mind, but if you go back, you might recall how children and adults filled parks during the 1980s.

portrait of boy holding frisbee
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For some reason, people seemed to be more active, preferring the outdoors instead of staying inside the house occupying themselves with social media, computers, chat rooms and video games, as many people do today. Tossing frisbees (remember those?) at a nearby park was a popular weekend pastime.

It was rare, certainly not as often heard as it had been just a decade earlier, but you could still hear an ice cream truck ringing in the distance. Parents sent their kids to the truck to buy an ice cream cone or another treat for them, at the same time that they gave their children as little as a dollar for an ice cream treat that they, the children, could enjoy.

Loving Family Tradition Goes Back to the 1980s

Another tradition that was slipping away was the family tradition of sitting around the dining room table enjoying a homecooked dinner. The television was shut off. Parents and children discussed the events of the day. Talk about a wonderful time for family bonding.

Oh, and when school let it, school was out. Unless you had homework to do, once you walked off the school grounds, you often didn’t bother to gossip about classmates. There were no pictures passed around, and no one that you felt was more popular than you because he received more “thumbs up” than you did.

Due to the fact that there wasn’t ample cell phone usage during the 1980s, another thing that was left behind at the end of the day was work. Fortunately, it really was possible to get away during this favorite decade. Trouble and challenge seemed packed away during the evening.

The 1980s – A Sweet Time

Yet, that’s the way that days gone by often seem and feel. Still, the 1980s was a time of family, outdoors fun and less technological connections. In-person relationships were highly desirable, sought after and nurtured, not with text messages or instant messaging, but instead with face-to-face lunch meetings, nights at the movies and visits to live music events.

Pop music was in vogue. So too was the women’s singing group En Vogue, and what a group. Those women were classy, sharp and had beautiful, powerful voices. Still, the 1980s was more than music. There were sports, namely Carl Lewis, Evelyn Ashford and Edwin Moses, who dominated track and field, a carryover from the 1970s. The 1980s was also the decade when television in the United States stayed on past midnight.

For so many reasons, the 1980s was a favorite decade. For so many, perhaps you, it was a sweet time, not that it didn’t have its challenges. But, in the memory there are experiences that lend the 1980s a spirit of fondness.